Official Scream Movie Ranking... (IDC ABOUT OTHER OPINIONS)
This is kinda terrible but I wanted to post something for Halloween and I couldn't miss the opportunity to talk about my beloved, the Scream franchise.
Sooo, the month of October has kinda come and gone and as I write and post this, it is October 31st. That means I have completely neglected halloween on this blog so I thought as an attempt at the apology I would finally put out into the digital world my definitive ranking of all five movies that make up the ICONIC film franchise that is… SCREAM. Since I was probably twelve I have loved the Scream movies and for the past week I have had the pleasure of revisiting these masterpieces and along the way I’ve been getting on the silly little Letterboxed app (@Josh_1408, I want to change this username so bad but I refuse to spend £14 a year on Letterboxed pro) and curating the ranking you are about to have the pleasure of reading. So go follow that, I want more followers! ANYWAY, here is my ranking of all the Scream movies, thank you for reading.
Fifth Place: Scream 2
This film, bar the iconic first movie, easily has the best cold open of all the films. Directly introducing the ‘Stab’ franchise into the films universe, something that would be continuously referenced for the next three movies, allows Scream 2 to perfectly continue the ‘meta-ness’ that the first movie began. Using Stab One’s cinema premiere as the backdrop for Jada Pinkett Smith and her SEXY boyfriend’s deaths is excellent (although if I am ever in a cinema with an audience being that loud and obnoxious, I fear blood will be on MY hands!) and I also LOVE how it makes for perfect commentary on the commercialisation of trauma (something ever present in our society now, I am looking at you Ryan Murphy). It is also the best part of the movie, this being a compliment and a critique of the film. You see, the rest of the movie #ToMe, falls flat, as we are introduced to the setting of Windsor College and Sidney’s friends who throughout the movie we learn absolutely nothing about. This is the main problem of the movie, the new characters have nothing that the audience can connect with. The most connection made is with Hallie, Sydney’s college roommate, who’s death while sad ultimately becomes lost in the pile of bodies that are stacked up in this movie (I will never forgive them for killing off Sarah Michelle Gellar that quickly). Talking of bodies, Randy Meeks, the only main character besides Sidney, Dewey and Gale to make it into two films in the entire franchise so far, is killed in this movie in maybe the most forgettable way ever, in fact we don’t even see him be killed as he is dragged into a van and murdered off camera. This disservice to a main character we had grown to care for in his time in the franchise, perfectly sums up this movie for me… unsatisfying. Even the main killer reveal lacks any shock value as I questioned who one of the killers, Mickey, even was. However, Mrs. Loomis kinda slayed in her role so I will give the movie that (although this did start a trend of the killer having some form of familial relation to another character so the movie gets another whack from me for that). I feel as though I’ve beaten this movie to death now, I am sorry Wes Craven, but on a brighter note I still gave this film four out of five stars, so that I guess that shows how excellent these films are!
Fourth Place: Scream 3
This entry to the franchise uses the setting of the filming site of ‘Stab 3: Return to Woodsboro’, again continuing the meta trend that makes this franchise so excellent. This film is camp at its finest! Characters like Jennifer Jolie (I will love you forever) and #Those bangs Gale has for the films entirety just add a flavour to this film that makes it DELECTABLE. However, I fear they underutilize Sidney of all people for the first half of the film, having her tucked away in that godforsaken cabin (BORING) but I guess it made sense for her character so I’ll forgive her. The chase scene of Sidney and Ghostface in the stab 3 version of her house from the first scream is actual art and adds even more layers to the films meta narrative which helps the film gain some extra points from me. This film does have the worst cold open though, buuuut at least Cotton Weary got what was coming to him so that made me smile! I don’t have much else to say about the film because, while it is better than scream 2, the movie kinda lacks memorability, particularly in terms of the deaths… The killer reveal was fun though, Jake from Scandal was perfect for the role, he’ll always creep me out. Buuuut I still don’t know how I feel about the reveal that he influenced Billy and Stu into starting the killings… if that were true why didn’t he become the killer in Scream 2 instead of Billy’s mum?? I digress… the movie was fun and I enjoyed it more than the second.
Third Place: Scream 4
Okay from now on I’m only singing praises because the next three movies are nothing short of masterpieces. EMMA ROBERTS THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE. I will die on the hill that Jill is the best Ghostface since Billy and Stu, and actually the smartest! I mean she is the only one that actually managed to trick people into believing her victim story, if only she’d realised she should probs stab Sidney more than TWICE… Side note, Emma Roberts could’ve been our generations Scream Queen if she’d done more slasher movies because the performance she delivers in this movie is spectacular. This is also the best of the ‘killer related to a main character’ storylines that we got in the movies, I mean, Jill was willing to kill her own mother, a sad slay. From start to finish this movie has all the elements of a perfect Scream movie, a camp cold open with the stab movie inside another stab movie (Lucy Hale and Kristen Bell, I thank you for your service), perfectly fleshed out characters and a Killer reveal that is somewhat shocking, makes sense and is fun to watch! I do find it absurd that Kirby was meant to be the same age as Jill and Olivia though, love her to death cant wait to see her in scream six, but she looked about twenty years older (also I will revolt if they don’t make her a lesbian). This film also had the best death of the killer of all the films prior (dethroned by Scream Five though), I mean Emma Roberts electrocuted in the head as Sydney and Gale yell ‘clear’?? yeah, that’s cinema.
Second Place: Scream 5/ Scream (2022)
This is a reboot for the ages. Never have I seen a film franchise be rebooted as successfully as Scream did with its fifth instalment. The introduction of new central characters such as Sam, Tara, Chad and Mindy (Chad and Mindy being the nieces of Randy Meeks, perfectly connecting to the original) rejuvenates the franchise much like Scream 4 did with characters such as Jill and Kirby. However, unlike Scream 4, the film obviously is attempting to start a new generation of survivors and this is done so well as all the new additions feel fresh and all ooze charisma (although I’ll be the first to admit, Sam takes some time to properly warm to). The back to basics approach of having the boyfriend of the main final girl (Sam) being one of the killers avoids feeling redundant and instead manages to create a fun, nostalgia-baity feel to the killer reveal that when paired with the iconic character of Amber (perfectly played by Mickey Madison) creates a flawless final act to the film. Now to discuss the major moments of the film… First of all, Scream 5 (I'm not calling it Scream (2022) I don’t care) creates another perfect cold opening with Jenna Ortega revealing to the world that she will be going down in the history books as one of our generations best scream queens, but to turn the staple opening of the film on its head having Tara survive tells the audience immediately that the rules of the previous four films will not be applied in this new generation of Scream. Which is further proved with the TRADGIC death of Dewey later in the film. Us fans of the film had our theories that Dewey would probably be the one from the main returning cast to get got in this film, but to see that man die right in front of my eyes, well nothing could prepare me for that. Ultimately this film delivers such fine nostalgia mixed with a new, fresh feeling to the franchise that has filled me with such joy that it is still top two of the movies released this year #ForMe. Also the death of Amber is officially the best death of the entire franchise, IDC!!
First Place: Scream
Coming in at number one… The cultural reset to end all cultural resets, the original Scream. If I were to say this is the best film ever created… then what? I could talk for hours about the multiple layers to this film and the influence this has had on the horror genre, I am genuinely so impressed and fascinated by this movie, I will forever be in awe of the mind of Wes Craven. I want to take this film apart from beginning to end but I am also aware that if I did that I could just make a blog post from that alone sooo I’ll hold myself back. You can’t talk about this film however, without first starting with the ICONIC opening that turned the whole franchise into what it is today. Having Drew Barrymore be at the centre of all the promotion of this film only to have her die within the first ten minutes, ultimately doing what Scream 5 would do 25 years later, the audience is immediately made aware of the fact that the rules established in horror movies such as Halloween and Friday The Thirteenth would not be used within the movie, Drew Barrymore would not be our final girl. Once the audience sees poor Casey stabbed to death, we are introduce to the real final girl of the movie, Sidney Prescott. Sidney would be used by the franchise throughout all the movies to make references to the common tropes in other horror movies, most specifically within this film the trope of girls who have sex not surviving the movie. She will forever be my ultimate final girl. The killer reveal within this movie is also the best of the franchise, I mean, you really can’t beat the original! Billy and Stu created what can only be described as a cultural phenomenon with that third act. However, I will never forgive them for the murder of my beloved, Tatum Riley, she could have done so much more if she only had TIME.
In conclusion, no franchise is touching the masterpiece that is Scream.